


Sebastian Barba

by jamesgatz1925



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: AU, First Time, Getting Together, Kid - Freeform, Love, M/M, Rated M for chapter 2, as in Barba's kid
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-03
Updated: 2017-07-03
Packaged: 2018-11-22 18:21:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11385780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jamesgatz1925/pseuds/jamesgatz1925
Summary: Sonny wants to be let in to Rafael's life, all of it.





	1. Chapter 1

The counselor checks his watch while downing the last of his first and only drink. It's barely 6 PM, the crew left the precinct incredibly early in light of a big win.

"I've gotta go," Barba announces, tossing a few bills on the table and grabbing his coat. "I'm off tomorrow. Don't bother me." It was not a request, it was an order, and the rest of the team just bid him goodnight.

"Where does he run off to?" Carisi asks, curiosity getting the best of him. Barba does this every time they're going to get together as a team. He never hangs out with them for the whole evening, he usually bows out after one drink.

Finn is the only one who hears Carisi's question, and of course he answers with a quiet, "Not our business."

It's not Carisi's business, that is true.

Doesn't stop his curiosity, though.

Carisi really likes Barba. Like...a lot. He is disappointed every time Barba denies his offer for a drink, or dinner, or his offer to just get to know each other.

Carisi is under the impression Barba is disappointed, too. Because while Barba's mouth says, "No thanks, Carisi, I'm incredibly busy." or, "No thanks, Carisi, I have plans.", his eyes look pleading and wishful. Carisi could just be projecting his own bummed feelings, but he knows what he sees. He sees a man who wants to say yes, but can't. He sees a man who is hiding something greater than anyone can say.

For months, Carisi tries to figure it out.

Is Barba married? No wedding band, but that's acceptable. Of course, he'd probably just deny Carisi straight out if he was married.

Is Barba ill? Surely somebody else would let him know. And there'd be other signs and symptoms.

Maybe Barba is helping his mother out more?

Maybe Barba has another job?

Maybe Barba just really doesn't like Carisi.

Carisi doesn't want to stop trying until Barba tells him to, because as of yet, Barba hasn't added a denial with, "And please stop asking." At this point, it is as though Barba expects Carisi to ask every other day if he wants to go out.

And then Barba goes missing for about a week.

Well, not really missing. He calls in sick every day for a week. It is unlike Barba, because usually he plays through the pain. Carisi has seen him go through arguments with tooth aches and migraines, through the flu and colds, so for Barba to call in sick, to hand his cases off to somebody else, Carisi knows Barba must be very sick.

Carisi throws together a batch of his mother's famous chicken soup and packs it up to take to Barba's, hoping to aid in the other man's recovery.

Carisi knocks on the door to Barba's apartment and grows nervous about just popping in uninvited. Unfortunately, he has no time to run away before Barba is answering the door.

Barba looks incredibly shocked and incredibly healthy. His eyes grow wide and he holds the door open just enough for Carisi to see only him.

"Carisi? What are you doing here?"

"I, uh, I heard you were sick so I made some soup and came to see that you are not sick."

Barba frowns. "Uh, no. I..." Barba nervously looks back into the apartment. "Look, this isn't a good time--"

Carisi grows annoyed. What the hell is Barba hiding? He wants to demand Barba tell him the truth, but it is not his place. Instead, he just grows angry.

"Listen, Barba, if you don't like me back, just freakin' tell me. I'm a big boy, I can handle--"

Barba doesn't take his eyes off Carisi until they both hear a soft spoken, "Daddy?"

Barba shuts his eyes and takes a deep breath. "Si, mi amor? Estás bien?" Barba asks behind the door, then he leans over and Carisi is so shocked he forgets to breathe.

Barba pushes the door open and reveals a tiny blonde toddler with a beautiful tan and giant green eyes that match Barba's. Carisi is still too surprised to breathe.

Barba kisses the boy's forehead and whispers asking the boy to play in his room for a few minutes. The boy nods, wiggles out of Barba's grasp, and runs away.

"Come on in," Barba mutters once the little boy is down the hall.

Carisi slides through the open door somehow, because he is so stunned he doesn't notice his feet move.

"Can you take off your shoes?" Barba asks over his shoulder as he walks further into the apartment.

Carisi does as asked, toeing off his shoes and kicking them next to the door. There's a rack of more shoes next to the door. On the top shelf: colorful shoes decorated with Minions and Batman; on the bottom: expensive, boring, familiar loafers. There's a coat rack above the shoes; hanging there are Barba's usual coats and much tinier versions of the expensive ones Barba dons.

Barba leads Carisi into the kitchen, which is also not anything Carisi ever imagined Barba's kitchen looking like. He always expected the expensive man to have perfectly new appliances, perfect dish sets, perfect everything. Instead, there are well used appliances, dish sets with cartoon characters in the sink, a half drank cup of coffee on the counter, and a plastic cup of milk with a crazy straw sticking out of the top.

Carisi tries to find signs of another person, Barba's partner or spouse, but there are only two of everything. Two sets of shoe racks, two sets of coats, two cups on the counter, two placemats at the dining table. If there aren't two, there's one, like one toy box in the living room, one visible rack of children's DVD's, one laundry basket of tiny clothes half empty and folded on the coffee table.

"Okay..." Carisi finally mutters. "What?"

"What do you mean, what? I have a son, Carisi."

Carisi shakes his head in confusion, like the words, the admission, made him pop out of his stunned state.

"Can I get you anything to drink?" Barba asks, opening the refrigerator. "Coffee that I made six hours ago and have been too busy to drink? Milk in any flavor? Kool-Aid? Pedialite? Scotch that I have to keep in a hidden cabinet because that's 'responsible'?

"Something to eat, maybe? Orange slices? Go-Gurt? String cheese? Applesauce? Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches--"

Carisi shakes his head again. "Can you stop for a second? Barba, come on, talk to me. What the hell, you have a kid? Since when?"

Barba closes the refrigerator. "Well, he'll be four in two weeks, so--"

"Hold on. From the beginning."

"What, am I being interrogated?" Barba sighs. "Fine, I'll tell you the truth. I had a one night stand, she got pregnant, we were somewhat together, she gave birth, she left us. She left me with my son--his name is Sebastian, by the way--and I've been off this week because he has an ear infection and he literally will not let me leave the apartment. I haven't left the apartment in four days, I've watched Moana thirty times, and I am going crazy.

"This is my life, Carisi. This is where I run off to every evening. I have to relieve my nanny, I have to read my son a story before he goes to sleep because I spend all day not seeing him and sometimes that's the only quality time I get with him. I eat macaroni and cheese for dinner three times a week and I sleep with ten tiny toes digging into my back. What do you think of that? Still want me?"

Carisi opens his mouth to reply, but he has no idea what to say. Thankfully he doesn't need to say anything, because a shrill, "Daddy!" is heard from down the hall.

"I'll be right back," Barba mutters, then walks away from Carisi.

Carisi can hardly hear what's happening down the hall, but soon he hears the toilet flush and the sink run. When Barba returns, he smells like sweet baby soap.

"Have I given you enough time to process?" Barba asks. "Because I can come back--"

"Just..." Carisi mumbles. "Why? Why do you hide this? Why do you push people away--"

"I receive daily death threats, Carisi. Do you think I need to drag him into that? Does he deserve that? I'm not dangling my kid in front of anybody who wants to push me down the steps of the courthouse."

"But me?" Carisi cries, voice raised. "You had to keep this gigantic fucking secret from me?"

"Can you please keep your voice down?" Barba calmly asks.

Carisi breathes out. "I apologize. I didn't mean to yell or use that language."

"Thank you," Barba says, then takes a sip of his coffee before making a sour face and pouring the remainder of the cup in the sink.

"I never told you because..." Barba continues, "Because I knew it would scare you off. Because I...I like your attention, Carisi, and I know that's unfair, because you deserve somebody, but I really liked you asking me out. I haven't...had anything...in a really long time. I liked being chased. Dios mio, I sound so stupid."

"Why do you assume it would have scared me off?" Carisi asks, because that's the part he catches. Barba assumed something about him and didn't even give him a chance. Carisi freakin' loves kids. And he really, really likes Barba. He would have been so willing to get to know Barba and his kid and to see what could happen with this. Barba didn't even give him a chance.

"Because everyone's scared off, Carisi. If they're not scared off by me, they're scared off by my life."

Carisi makes a quick decision. "I'm not," he says, "I'm not scared. I want it all. I like you, Barba, a real fu-frea-...a lot."

Barba cracks a smile.

"I understand if...if you still deny after this. I'm asking one more time. But Barba, if you say yes, I'm in. I want you and everything you have to offer."

Barba takes a deep breath. "Okay. Follow me."

Carisi follows Barba down the hall and into the first bedroom. The walls are a pale green, the bed against the wall is a half taken apart baby crib that clearly doesn't get slept in, and there are toys everywhere. Every kind of toy Carisi could have ever imagined as a kid: trucks and cars, stuffed animals, a dollhouse and little wooden dolls, a cute little table set out with tea party dishes, dinosaurs, and a rack of kid costumes. It's the bedroom made of children's dreams, all that's missing is the candy.

Carisi doesn't really take in any of that. He fixates on the tiny boy sitting smack in the middle of the room, propped against a giant stuffed alligator, flipping through the pages of a Moana book. He is an adorable kid.

"Hey, Papito," Barba says softly in a voice Carisi has never heard. "Qué estás haciendo?"

"Reading," Sebastian says, his voice soft and sweet. He glances up and notices he and his father still are not alone. He grows visibly shy.

Barba kneels and the little boy crawls into his arms.

"Buddy, I want you to meet my friend. This is Sonny."

Carisi's heart bursts, because this is the first time Barba's ever used his nickname, or any name other than "Detective" or "Carisi".

Sonny leans closer. "Hi, it's nice to meet you. What's your name?"

"Sebastian," the boy replies simply, wrapping his arms around Rafael's neck and resting his head on his shoulder.

So close together, Sonny sees an obvious resemblance between the two. Sebastian looks very much like his father, except he is blonde.

Sebastian begins to talk again. "Your name has 'ssss', too. Like sssnake and Sssuperman and Sssunday, when we go to church."

"Wow," Sonny says, impressed. "That's very good, Sebastian. You're very smart."

"I know, Daddy teached me."

"Taught," Rafael corrects. "Remember, I taught you?"

Sebastian nods. He looks at Rafael again. "Daddy, I'm hungry."

"Oh, good. What do you want to eat?"

Rafael lifts the small boy into his arms and carries him out of the room, nodding for Sonny to follow.

Sebastian chooses strawberry ice cream, and Rafael doesn't deny him.

"I promise he usually does not eat strawberry ice cream for lunch," Rafael says, scooping generously. "It's just that he hasn't eaten much since getting sick, and I just want something in his stomach, you know?"

"Don't even worry about it," Sonny accepts. He wouldn't judge Rafael's parenting anyway. The boy is obviously well taken care of.

Rafael smiles at him.

"Daddy," Sebastian gets his attention. "Did you ask your friend if he wants ice cream?"

Rafael smiles wider as Sonny's heart bursts at how adorable this kid is.

"Sonny," Rafael says. "Would you like some ice cream?"

"I'd love some."

Sebastian smiles proudly when his father places the bowl in front of him. The three men sit down to eat their dessert lunch.

Sebastian is seated at the head of the table, between Rafael and Sonny, and that's decidedly too close to the stranger, because he pushes his bowl towards Rafael and climbs into his lap instead.

"He's not usually this clingy," Rafael tries to make the excuse.

"Nah, it's adorable," Sonny says, smiling fondly.

Rafael returns the smile. "Hey buddy," he says to Sebastian. "Would you like to get to know Sonny? Ask him questions?"

"Sure," Sebastian says between bites. "What's your favorite color?"

Sonny laughs. Rafael shakes his head.

"No, I meant, why don't you ask Sonny about his job or his life?"

"Colors is life," Sebastian argues.

Rafael shrugs. "Okay, fair enough. Sonny, what's your favorite color?"

"Uhm...I really like blue."

"Blue's good," Sebastian says. "I like red and pink and maroon and what's that other one, Daddy?"

"Burgundy."

"Mhm, that. Do you like Moana?"

"I've...never seen it," Sonny admits.

Sebastian looks at Rafael as if he's concerned for the stranger. "Can we watch it, Daddy? Please?"

Rafael sighs. "Sonny, would you like to watch Moana with us?"

Carisi eagerly nods.

The three sit down to watch the movie, Sebastian half on top of his father and Sonny on the other side of him. Pretty soon, Sebastian shifts to lay his head in Rafael's lap, and he falls asleep quickly after that.

"We don't have to keep watching this," Barba says.

Sonny isn't watching, he's staring at Rafael's hand combing through thick blonde hair. "I'm not really paying attention."

Rafael smiles.

Eventually, Rafael wiggles his way out from under Sebastian and the two men return to the kitchen for fresh coffee.

"So," Rafael starts. "What do you think?"

Sonny suddenly grabs him and kisses him. Rafael is stunned, but he immediately grips Sonny back and kisses like his life depends on it, too. Months and months of pent up feeling and sexual tension spill out, and all that matters is their hot breath and tongues and hands all over each other.

"That wasn't an answer," Rafael whispers when Sonny attaches his lips to the side of his neck.

"I think your sexiness level went up, like...a thousand percent."

Rafael chuckles. "Why, do you have a thing for single fathers?"

"I have a thing for you," Sonny says. "And you're amazing, and I like you so much."

"I like you too," Rafael says, taking Sonny's face in his hands so Sonny will stop kissing him for a second. "You have no idea how hard it's been, Sonny, how badly I wanted to just tell you but how afraid I was that you would react well, because it's happened so many times before, and we were already left one major time and--"

"Ssshhh," Sonny stops him. "It's so cliche to say that I'm different, but I am. I'm here for you, all of you."

Rafael smiles. He's about to kiss Sonny again when Sebastian starts crying on the couch.

"You're here for that?" Rafael jokes, immediately letting Sonny go to return to the couch.

Sebastian climbs into Rafael's arms. "I didn't know where you were, Daddy!" Giant crocodile tears fall down smooth cheeks. "I waked up and you were gone!"

"I was just in the kitchen, Papito. Sonny and I were making coffee. Hey, it's time for your medicine, okay? Will you have a snack and take it, please?"

Sebastian begins to cry harder. "No, Daddy! No!"

"Ssshhh," Rafael whispers, closing his own eyes and cradling the boy close.

And then, killing Sonny completely, he begins to sing. He softly whispers the melody and words in Spanish, and Sonny can't make out any of it besides words of love, but Sebastian is soothed and his crying turns in to soft hiccups instead. Rafael shifts him so he's being cradled like a baby, then Rafael carries him into the kitchen.

With one hand, Rafael gathers the liquid medicine and pours it in to a medicine cup, then brings it to Sebastian's lips. He doesn't stop singing, he doesn't falter in his grip on the boy, he just feeds him his medicine with practiced ease.

"There," Rafael says, dropping the medicine cup into the sink. "There's my brave boy, I'm so proud of you. Now, you can have any snack you want."

Sebastian chooses graham crackers, so Rafael, still with one hand, takes the crackers out of a cabinet and hands Sebastian a small stack. He carries Sebastian back to the couch and sits him down again.

"Hey," Sonny says, "Remember when I said a thousand percent?"

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, now it's, like, six million."

Rafael just grins and takes Sonny's hand between them.

Sonny stays all evening, talking to Sebastian about anything and everything. Sebastian asks him a million questions about his life and his interests. Sonny learns that Sebastian's favorite superhero is Wonder Woman, because his daddy took him to see the movie and she was amazing. Sonny stays for dinner, he even runs out to get cheese pizza--something he has never ordered--and around 8 o'clock, it's time for Sebastian to go to bed.

"Can I sleep in your bed, Daddy?" he sweetly asks, but Sonny suspects it's not his first time sleeping with his dad and Rafael isn't saying yes just because Sebastian is sick.

Rafael nods, then carries the boy to his large bed.

Sonny stays in the doorway of the bedroom, not intruding, as Rafael carefully lays the boy down and smooths big blankets over him.

"Got your cobija?" Rafael asks.

Sebastian holds up a ragged little green baby blanket and snuggles it close to himself.

"Oso?"

Sebastian digs a little squished bear out from under the comforter and shoves it under his head.

"Okay," Rafael says. "Story or song?"

"Song!"

Rafael smiles. He leans close to the tiny boy and begins to sing another song in Spanish, but Sonny recognizes that it is You Are My Sunshine.

Soon, Sebastian is out like a light, so Rafael goes back to Sonny, pulling the bedroom door closed so it's open just a crack.

Rafael leans against Sonny, visibly exhausted.

"Still--"

"Yes, absolutely."

Sonny rubs the back of Rafael's neck and kisses the side of his head.

"Look," Rafael says, standing up straight. "I would love to invite you to stay for a drink, to stay for...whatever you want. But I am extremely exhausted. He hasn't been to bed this early all week, it's just been excruciating pain at night, and--"

Sonny stops him. "Rafael, you don't need to explain. I understand. Just tell me to go and I'll go."

"I want you to stay--"

Sonny nods, because he understands. "I get it. Don't sweat, okay? We have time."

Rafael smiles. He takes Sonny's hand and leads him to the front door.

"Thank you," Rafael says when they reach the door.

"For?" Sonny asks.

"For everything. For stopping by to check on me when you thought I was sick. For getting...all of this. For dinner, and watching Moana again, and--"

"Thank you for letting me in."

Rafael wraps his arms around Sonny's waist, so Sonny hugs around Rafael's neck. He kisses Rafael's forehead, then Rafael digs his face into Sonny's neck.

"I have wanted this so badly," Rafael admits.

"I know, me too."

They kiss a few more times before Sonny leaves. Rafael slumps against the door, feeling extremely relieved and loved and so happy.

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 41 is now complete! This chapter has smut.

Sonny and Rafael are inseparable quickly. With so much time to make up, and so much to learn about each other, Sonny is at the Barba apartment more often than not. He assists in making dinner for Sebastian, he helps Rafael by washing dishes or generally cleaning up. On off days, he brings donuts because Sebastian loves chocolate donuts.

Four now, Sebastian has decided he is a big boy and needs absolutely nobody's help doing anything. Still, Rafael absolutely loves it when Sebastian says, "I want Sonny to do it." or, "I want Sonny to help me." It takes Sonny a single afternoon to teach Sebastian how to tie his shoes.

Rafael falls completely in love with Sonny so quickly, not that he ever expected he wouldn't. But seeing Sonny bond with Sebastian, seeing Sonny take to Lucia, it warms Rafael's icy heart.

Rafael talks it over a few months in with one of his close friends, a single mother named Caroline with a daughter Sebastian's age who they met at parent-and-me classes years ago.

"So you obviously love this guy," Caroline says over the phone. "What do you expect from this?"

"I don't know," Rafael says, cutting a peanut butter and jelly sandwich into dinosaur shapes.

"He's amazing with Sebastian, your mom loves him. Do you want to get serious with him? Would you invite him to move in with you?"

"I...I really don't know. I want to be with him, though. I know that."

"How's the sex?"

Rafael drops the sandwich in front of Sebastian, glad he didn't have the phone on speaker.

"I wouldn't know."

"Wait, it's been, like, six months and you haven't had sex?"

"No, I have a four year old in my bed every night."

"Come on, Raf. One of us needs to get laid. Send Sebastian to your mother's. Let him sleep over here with Dez. Or make him sleep in his own damn bed."

Rafael laughs. "He's never slept away from me."

"Cut the cord, Rafi. Spend a night away from your son. Fuck your hot boyfriend."

"Ssshhh!" Rafael laughs again. "Not so loud. Okay, I'll let you know what happens. I've gotta go."

"Good luck!" Caroline says before Rafael hangs up.

Rafael makes arrangements for Sebastian to spend the night with Lucia, and they are both extremely excited. Sebastian packs all of his favorite toys in his suitcase and doesn't need clothes because Lucia has spare of everything for him. Lucia picks him up around lunchtime so Rafael can get ready for his huge date night, and Lucia just smiles knowingly as Rafael ushers them out.

"Call me if you need absolutely anything," Rafael tells Sebastian, kissing his head over and over. "Teeth brushed before bed, okay? And not too much sugar, por favor?" The last instruction was for Lucia. "I love you so much."

"I love you too, Daddy. Have fun with Sonny!"

Lucia giggles. "Si, Papi, have fun with Sonny."

"Ha-ha," Rafael mocks, kisses them both again, then they leave.

Rafael takes a long, slow shower, getting excited at the prospect of the evening. When he gets out, he changes the sheets to his softest, most expensive set that he hasn't used since before Sebastian was born.

Rafael is wearing a set of clean sweats and an old Harvard t-shirt that he usually wears to avoid breakfast, or vomit, or snot, or spit from ruining a nice suit. He has a suit set out, one that he'll wear when Sonny comes over for the extravagant dinner he's going make by hand, but for now he is relaxing alone for the first time in over four years.

The doorbell rings and that jolts Rafael out of his peaceful relaxation. Confused, he wanders to the door and opens it.

Surprised to find Sonny on the other side, he steps in to let the other man in. Sonny is holding a large box, and Rafael is doubly confused.

"I thought you weren't getting off until late," Rafael says, smirking at his own innuendo.

Sonny sweeps by and kisses him before entering the apartment further. "I had overtime saved up, so I left early. Where's Sebastian? I have something for him."

"You do?" Rafael asks, curious.

Sonny places a box on the kitchen island. "So I went to my mom's the other day, right? I grabbed all of this for him to try out. Poor kid needs video games, Rafi."

Sonny pulls out a Super Nintendo, two controllers, and a dozen different games.

"That's amazing!" Rafael cries. "He'll be so excited, thank you for thinking of him."

Sonny smiles. "So where is my buddy?"

"Actually," Rafael says, "I had a whole evening planned for you, but you kind of ruined it. Sebastian is with my mother, I was going to make dinner, and I thought we could..."

Sonny's eyes grow slightly wider. "Could..."

Rafael steps up close to him and kisses the side of his neck. "I changed the sheets. They no longer smell like baby lotion. I took out the stuffed animals and baby blankets."

Sonny's breath hitches when Rafael runs his tongue over his skin.

"You sure?" Sonny asks.

Rafael attaches his lips to Sonny's neck completely. Sonny groans and grips Rafael's hips.

Dinner is quickly forgotten. They stumble down the hall to Rafael's bedroom, side stepping a Hot Wheels track that Sebastian made Rafael pinky-promise not to take apart.

Sonny slams Rafael against the door as soon as it's shut. He kisses Rafael roughly, and Rafael's body realizes how touch starved it's been over the past few years, because he needs his clothes off now, and he needs Sonny's clothes off now. He yanks at Sonny's jacket and tie, then yanks his shirt tails out of his pants. Sonny pulls Rafael's shirt over his head and pins Rafael to the door with his hips.

"Oh god, yes," Rafael sighs, feeling Sonny's hardness against his own. "Yes, baby, I need you."

"I know. I know, Rafi, I'll take care of you, I promise."

They move to the bed and divest each other of the rest of their clothing. Naked in the bed, their hands rake over each other, every inch. They kiss sweetly, whispering words of encouragement and praise.

Sonny begs Rafael to fuck him, to fill him up and make him come, and Rafael is more than willing to please Sonny.

"Holy fuck, Rafi, yes!" Sonny cries as Rafael finally sinks into him. His back arches and he squeezes Rafael tight.

Once Rafael is fully seated, Sonny's hips begin to move on their own, rotating under Rafael to get their friction going.

"Oh, shit, Sonny...don't," Rafael begs. "Don't, baby, I won't last."

"Come on, Rafi, fuck me."

Rafael squeezes his eyes shut and digs his forehead into Sonny's. His body is tight and stiff. Sonny wants him to relax.

"Relax, honey," Sonny whispers. "It's okay, just relax. I don't care how long you last, I want to make you feel good." Sonny kisses at his lips.

"I just...haven't had sex in over four years," Rafael admits. "And you feel so fucking good."

Sonny rubs his back. "Relax, okay? Stop thinking." Sonny's hands massage from Rafael's neck to his ass, where he squeezes and pushes so Rafael's hips push a little bit deeper.

"I've wanted you for so long," Sonny says. "I've thought of this a million times."

"Really?"

"Absolutely. You have no idea how many times I've gotten off to the thought of you bending me over your desk in the office, or fucking me in an interrogation room. I think about pushing you into one of the chairs and riding you until you scream."

Rafael moans at the thought. He slowly begins to thrust in and out of Sonny.

Sonny keeps talking. "I want to get on my knees for you under your desk. Suck you off while you take a call." Sonny writhes, meeting each of Rafael's thrusts. "Ah, fuck, harder."

Rafael complies. He grips Sonny's hips to hold him down and completely uses him. Rafael gives in to what his body is begging for. Sonny howls beneath him, his back arching as he wraps his legs tight around Rafael's waist.

Sonny comes untouched and Rafael comes so hard that he blacks out.

When he comes to, Rafael is laying on his back and Sonny is kissing and licking every inch of him.

"When will Sebastian be home?" Sonny asks between kisses to Rafael's ribs.

"He's spending the night with my mother."

Sonny suddenly throws himself out of the bed. Rafael sits up and watches.

"Where are you going?"

"We're going to need to stay hydrated if I plan on doing you at least three more times before tomorrow morning."

Rafael flops back onto the bed and smiles.

After that first night, Sonny spends the night far more often. They slowly convince Sebastian to sleep in his own bed, but the first month is spent in a crowded bed with three men, two skinny, blonde, and Rafael's entire world.

Sonny spends the next few months trying his hardest to bond with Sebastian. Sebastian lets him in, because sometimes Sonny is more fun than his daddy. Sonny makes way better chocolate milk, and blanket forts, and soap beards in the bath. Rafael sings better songs, and his arms are warmer, and Sebastian still cries for him when he's sick or scared, but Sonny comes at a close second.

Sonny loves taking Sebastian and Rafael to Staten Island to visit his parents. The Carisi clan falls in love with Sebastian just as quickly as Sonny had, and they spoil him with gifts and Italian foods. Sonny only had nieces until this point, so his parents are so thrilled with a little boy finally, not that he needs to be treated differently. He gladly plays dolls with Bella's daughter who is around his age.

Another thing Sonny has loved introducing Sebastian to is baseball. Baseball is what Sonny and his father shared together, and although Sonny knows the boundaries between father and son activities, Sonny loves sharing interests with him.

Sonny takes them to Queens to attend their first baseball game right before Sebastian turns five. He had bought Sebastian a Mets cap that matches his own, and Rafael's heart melts at the photo he snaps of Sebastian on Sonny's hip with both of their caps on backwards.

Sonny moves in right after that, not that it makes much of a difference. Half of his belongings had already migrated over, and he already slept over more often than not. Sebastian loves it, because now he doesn't have to call Sonny to ask him to bring donuts for breakfast, he can just jump into his dad's bed and demand Sonny take him down to the bakery. Which, of course, Sonny happily does, because making Sebastian as happy as can be is the number one thing on his to-do list.

Cases grow tougher for Sonny, especially when children are involved. After their first major child victim case, Sonny breaks down in Rafael's office.

"How are you not such a wreck so much more often?" Sonny asks.

"I am. But I just think of him and getting to go home to him and I feel more lucky than scared or worried. I think of Hector Rodriguez's mother, and how she will never hug her baby again, and I just...feel so happy that mine is tucked away safe at home."

Sonny accepted that answer and used Sebastian's love as motivation to be better at his job.

Two years pass unnoticed, and Sebastian finally asks why his dad and Sonny are not married.

"Would it be okay with you if we got married?" Rafael curiously asks.

"Yeah. 'Cause then I'd have two dads. Everyone I know has two parents."

"I don't have two parents."

"That's 'cause Abuela's the best and she was enough for you."

Rafael furrows his eyebrows. "Was I not enough for you? Gee, thanks, son."

His six-year-old smiles. "That's not what I meant! I just think it'd be cool to have two dads, that's all."

They continue eating their dinner that Sonny had to work late to miss.

"Do you think Sonny would want to marry us?" Sebastian asks.

Rafael raises an eyebrow. "Us?" he repeats.

"Well, yeah, I'm here, too. He marries you, he marries me."

Rafael shakes his head in disbelief. When did his son get so smart?

"Do you want me to ask Sonny to marry me, then?"

Sebastian nods. "I'll ask, too."

Rafael smiles, then thinks of the perfect plan. He and Sebastian will make Sonny a romantic dinner, and they'll both pop the question.

A week later is when they decide to carry out their plan. It's the day one of Rafael's important cases ends (with a win to boost his ego), so he races home to pick Sebastian up from school and head to the grocery store before Sonny gets off. He asks Olivia not to let Sonny go early, and she thankfully agrees.

By the time Sonny walks through the door, both men are dressed to the nines and their dinner is ready. Sebastian attacks Sonny as soon as he gets the key in the knob, but Rafael stands back in the kitchen to keep the food from burning.

"Did you have a good day?" Sebastian asks Sonny with his arms tight around Sonny's neck.

"It was alright. I'm just glad to be home with you and Daddy." Sonny mumbles as they enter the kitchen. He takes one look at Rafael's attire, notices Sebastian's, then looks incredibly confused. "What's going on?"

"Me and Daddy wanna ask you to marry us!"

Rafael closes his eyes, but begins to laugh. "Thank you, son."

Sonny slowly lowers the boy from his arms. "Wait, what?"

"Surprise," Rafael says, non-enthusiastically. "Or at least, it was supposed to be a surprise, until--"

Sonny grabs his face and plants a long kiss on his lips.

"Woo hoo!" Sebastian cheers.

Rafael tears his lips away from Sonny. "Excuse me, I'm supposed to ask."

"Aww," Sebastian sighs. "Well, hurry up."

"Dios mio. Ve a buscar el anillo."

Sebastian runs away to fetch the ring, and finally alone, Rafael takes Sonny's hands in his.

"Our time together has been more than ideal," Rafael says. "When Sebastian asked why we aren't married, I couldn't give him an answer. I don't know why. I don't know why I've never asked. You've been the perfect addition to our life and I couldn't be more thankful that you love me and my son."

Rafael drops to one knee right there on the dirty kitchen floor. Sonny hasn't even taken his coat off, yet.

Sebastian runs up and hands Rafael the box, then climbs into Sonny's arms again.

Rafael slowly takes the ring out of the box. "So Sonny, Dominick Carisi, will you marry me?"

"And me!" Sebastian yells in Sonny's ear.

"Oh my god," Sonny mutters. "Yes, absolutely."

Rafael smiles widely as Sebastian cheers. Rafael slips the ring on Sonny's finger, then Sonny pulls him to his feet to give him a long kiss. Sebastian hugs them both, small arms wrapped around both of their necks, as he cheers and cheers.

Sonny changes for dinner, and so does Sebastian because he hates "fancy" clothes, and soon they eat their nice family meal in jeans and t-shirts. Rafael and Sonny have pasta and wine, and Sebastian has macaroni and cheese with apple juice.

They plan a wedding immediately, because Sebastian is impatient while waiting for his dads to be joined. They agree to have Sebastian as not only their ring bearer but also as their joined best man, and he wears the exact same suit that Rafael does.

Their wedding is almost exclusively controlled by Sebastian, from the guest list ("We are NOT inviting my teacher!") to the refreshments afterwards ("Popcorn! We need popcorn! And apple juice!").

Sonny presents Sebastian with a gift of a Mets jersey with 'BARBA-CARISI 1' across the back, per Rafael's permission. Rafael tries to convince Sebastian that he doesn't need to wear it for the ceremony, but in the end, Rafael loses, because Sonny overrides his decision and says Sebastian can wear whatever he wants. So Rafael is surprised when Sebastian walks down the isle in the jersey.

Despite the wardrobe change, it's a beautiful day. In the end, they're married, and Sebastian is their happy son. He sits between his dads, on Sonny's lap, while they eat dinner and eventually cake. They let Sebastian cut the cake, which is disastrous but wonderful, and at the end of the night, Sebastian goes with Bella to spend the night with his new cousins. Sonny and Rafael go home to celebrate alone, and find Sebastian left them notes all over the house that say, "I love you, Dad and Daddy!"

Sonny officially adopts Sebastian a year later, then Sebastian becomes a true Barba-Carisi, and he is the happiest little boy, and his dads are the happiest dads.

 


End file.
